Life, Love

2019. So far so good?

Ah, 2019. August 2019 in fact. What have we learned so far? Well, Boris is in, Theresa is out. Its been really hot. Its also been really rainy. Thats about it. Literally all ive learned so far. Ish.

2019 hasnt really gone the way I hoped it would when it started. But saying that, neither did 2018. I’ve not lost 40lbs, ive not saved Β£40 for that matter. Ive not got off the dusty singles shelf, and tbh i really cant be arsed. I think ive maybe been on 3 dates this year. All less successful than the prior. I said to my mum that i’d been on one recently, so basically, like jabs, i was done for another 6 months. Ha.

Have I learned anything?

Well, ive learned im still really good at shopping. Also that hangovers definitely do last longer in your thirties. My baking is still on point and my cakes are going well. Im thinking about starting to do more for cafes etc. Take it up a notch. Ive realised that i can not work 2+ shifts in the pub on top of a full time job because, basically, im not as young as I was. I need rest. I just cant do a half arsed job, which is how I feel I have been the last few months.

I turn 36 next month. My overies have less action than Chernobyl and my friends are all happily married with children. Im getting more grey hair (so ive embraced this by going pink for a change). Ive discovered that I have a love for girls nights, lies in and my pyjamas. I have a hatred of the gym (Β£450 for one swim, Cheers Virgin Active and the 12 month contract). Ive had an upset tummy for months now and an endoscopy looming. I havent had a good nights sleep since I was last pissed, even then waking up for a strategic sick just so I could go back to sleep. My nails are really weak because i purchased a shellac machine and have taken to re-doing them too often. Never mind. Ive gained 3 more tattoos and 2 piercings, which my parents are disgraced at (i am 35, this is basically my mid life crisis).

The rest of 2019 has to be better, right? Having spent Friday and Saturday night seeing Ed Sheeran live in Roundhay Park, that was a belter of a weekend. And sort of the right thing to be doing. Ive been trying to be more positive you see.

Yes. Ive gained all the weight back that I lost, and a few lbs extra along the way. Wether this is because I love a binge eat of my feelings, or its the tablets im taking, I dont know. What i do know is that 90% of my wardrobe no longer fits, my tummy is wobbly and im scared of impending vagina fat. Girls, you know what im on about, youve seen the unlucky ones with it, and probably commented it on it too. Im never having that. So im heading back to SW as it works for me. Little changes need to be made. A good friend told me not to make a goal as it makes things less achievable and if you dont hit it, you feel guilty. I think she’s gotta point.

I just know that I need to find something I love. Something that makes me happy, and shopping can not be that! I dont even know what im wittering about now. Ive gone off on a tangent. Hey ho.


Jode xx